Wednesday, December 14, 2016

Moving On: "It's Not a Race"

I wanted to touch on a subject that most may find really tugs at your hearts strings.

What happens when the person you spent many years with moves on with love, but you haven't?

It may sting, it may bother and also bring about a lot of new emotions you thought you had already dealt with early on. The truth is you may have only swept them under the rug. The real moment when you know you are completely over your previous relationship is when you see them holding hands with another human being before your eyes.

This moment happened to me not to long ago and I wanted to write about it in a heart beat! Instead I let the emotions process, and as usual I felt nothing in the beginning. I was calm and removed from emotions, until I wasn't. I took a jog by my house and that's when it hit me, it was as if the universe conked me on the head with a tree! I stopped dead in my tracks, had myself a little cry while looking out into the open space before me, then to the sky I prayed and asked God to just comfort me in that moment. (Once again, whatever you believe in- do it!) I decided that I was ok. I was happy for him and that this time projecting resentment was not the bee's knees. I could feel my heart swell with appreciation.

I had a few special moments with people over the last 6 months. These people came into my life for a reason and reminded me that my heart is still very capable of love and my soul capable of connecting with another. In fact the magic remains that I will appreciate it so much more. The fear I once had is gone, not so much guarded and far more willing to take a chance. 

Deeper though is the confidence found within myself by not repeating the same mistake again. Jumping into a romantic situation just because I need someone there by my side and deeming them my boyfriend before even knowing them completely. Because often I've done things quickly in life this time, I'm going to do the opposite. I have stopped pushing things, chasing and or giving myself into what I'm not ready for. Self respect is needed with matters of the heart. ❤

I like to examine patterns of behavior and what I can do to remedy them. Perhaps if you are in a similar state of being you may want to think outside of the box and do some things completely different with your dating scenarios going forward. I have a few friends who were single for 7-9 years and then suddenly found themselves engaged in 6 months. Right now, that honestly makes no sense to me- however, I have an open mind. =)

I've been told to write lists of what I want in a partner- but I can't bring myself to do that. People are flawed, they have goods and bads, I like to think I have good intuition so for me I'm just living life.

Back to seeing that your previous significant other has moved on. Accept it. That is one of the best things to do, and let it go. Realize that you are going to do the same thing, and that there is love lurking around the corner for you too. Above all, love yourself and continue on your mission to creating the best relationship you can with your number one. Don't allow the dark cloud to take over, there is far too much sunshine in your soul that others cannot wait to see!

Moving on is not a race, there is no finish line to arrive at. You have to bring yourself into the Now and live through each moment knowing that life will find a way. Forgive yourself for the things you can't control and take control of the things you can. Career, daily tasks, how you treat others, etc...Shape it for you and let all else go. I believe in you as everyone deserves to be happy.

Peace for you today and a big smile!

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